Designing Gentle Systems
I used to chase the perfect routine.
The kind that would unlock my focus, fuel creative bursts, and run like a well-oiled machine—every minute accounted for, every friction solved. It was satisfying on paper. But life kept interrupting.
And when it did, the system collapsed.
Or more truthfully, I did.
What I’ve learned since: a system doesn’t have to be rigid to be reliable.
It just has to be honest.
Now, I design gentle systems.
Not for control, but for return.
Not to “win the morning,” but to meet it.
Here’s what that looks like.
🌀 1. Anchors, Not Agendas
My days don’t begin with a strict schedule. They begin with anchors — moments that matter, loosely timed, designed to reconnect me to myself and the day.
Brahma Muhurta wake
Quiet sitting or chant
Sunlight with my dog
One handwritten reflection
If I miss one, the others still hold.
This isn’t about discipline as punishment. It’s about devotion as design.
🔄 2. Loops, Not Ladders
I build systems in loops, not ladders.
A ladder says: climb this, level up, never look back.
A loop says: return here, again and again, each time a little different.
Weekly check-ins.
Monthly resets.
Seasonal reflections.
They don’t have to be perfect. They just have to keep cycling. Like breath. Like tides. Like growth.
🌱 3. Tending Over Tracking
There was a time I tracked everything—steps, sleep, output, inputs. But at some point the tracking became louder than the listening.
Now I ask: What wants attention?
Sometimes it's my spine. Sometimes my inbox. Sometimes my daughter’s giggle.
I jot what matters in a small notebook. Not as proof, but as presence.
🤝 4. Systems Should Serve the Soul
If a system makes me feel like I’m failing every day, it’s not a system—it’s a stick.
So I’ve stopped designing for “high performance” and started designing for congruence. Do my systems help me live the kind of life I claim to value? Do they match the season I’m in, not just the season I aspire to?
Some days, that means doing less. Some days, it means finishing what I start. But always, it means designing with my life, not against it.
These systems aren’t static. They evolve. They break. But they remind me: life isn’t meant to be optimised, it’s meant to be lived.
And in that living, sometimes gently, we return.
Still thinking.